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So much of what we do in life feels like an obligation: I have to go to work. I have to pay the bills. I have to take care of others. This language, however, creates a mindset of powerlessness, as though we’re passengers on a train with no control over the destination. But what if we shifted (SHYFTiD®) our internal dialogue from I have to to I choose to? This simple but profound change unlocks a sense of empowerment and intention.
When we say I have to, we’re essentially telling ourselves that there’s no choice, no room for alternatives. This language implies that life is happening to us, rather than through us. It creates a sense of obligation rather than empowerment and leaves little space to evaluate whether our actions align with what we truly want or value.
But here’s the truth: life is full of choices. Every day, we make decisions—some small, some monumental—that shape our lives. Even when the options feel limited, we are still actively choosing one path over another. Recognizing this is the first step toward living with intention.
Shifting (shyfting) from I have to to I choose to reframes our actions as intentional decisions. Instead of feeling trapped by obligations, we acknowledge that we are actively participating in shaping our lives.
*Include your own whys at the end of your statements.
This subtle shift changes the narrative. It reminds us that our actions, even when challenging, are tied to values and priorities we care about.
Living a fulfilling life requires intentionality. When we constantly say I have to, we run the risk of losing sight of why we’re doing what we’re doing. By changing the narrative to I (verb), we create space to evaluate whether our actions align with what truly matters to us.
When you frame your actions as choices, you can connect them to your “why.” Why are you working so hard? Why are you prioritizing certain relationships? By revisiting these questions, you ensure your actions serve a meaningful purpose.
Recognizing that you are choosing your actions—even in difficult situations—gives you a sense of control. It’s a reminder that you are an active participant in your life, not just a bystander.
When you acknowledge that you’re making choices, you also allow yourself to change them. If a choice no longer aligns with your values or goals, you have the power to pivot. This flexibility is essential for growth and fulfillment.
Start by catching yourself when you say I have to. Pause and reframe it as I choose to. Then, connect it to a reason that aligns with your values or priorities.
Take time to reflect on why you’re making the choices you are. Are they still serving you? Are they aligned with the life you want to build?
If you realize that a choice no longer supports your values or goals, consider letting it go. Replace it with actions that better align with your vision for a fulfilling life.
Remind yourself that even in tough situations, you’re exercising choice. Celebrate the fact that you are actively shaping your life and moving closer to your own version of fulfillment.
At its core, a fulfilling life is one lived with intention—where our actions align with our values and priorities. By shifting our mindset from I have to to I choose to or I do, we reclaim control over our decisions and reinforce the idea that we are not powerless.
Life is, indeed, a game of “would you rather?” Every choice we make reflects what we’d rather prioritize, value, or pursue. When we choose intentionally, we’re no longer operating on autopilot. We’re designing a life that feels authentic, meaningful, and fulfilling.
So the next time you catch yourself saying I have to, pause and consider: What am I really choosing and why? Adjust the language, connect to your why, and embrace the freedom to live a life that’s truly yours.
#IntentionalLiving #EmpoweredChoices #FulfillmentThroughAction #Confidence #PersonalMastery #Empowerment #IChoose #Emotional #Relational #Financial
